Mythology of Pussy and Dick Expanded

Coming Soon from

Black Bird Press

expanded version

aprox 400 pages

A Marvin X Classic

The book will be a great source by which young people can come to grips with their troubling sexuality. It will help move the internal conflicts from below the solar plexus to above the neck. For many young people, especially black men in their 20s and 30s, there is little more than hot amorphous vapor in that region. So-called urban lit is their bible in coming to grips with the violent urgings of their penis. I used to conceal my own risings with a jock strap. It took me sometime to train myself to sit still: running after a woman, any attractive woman, was an addictive impact on the soul. Your teachings in this matter is a kind of how-to book, much needed within our oppressed communities where inordinate violence is turned within, on our women, on our children, and our reckless unfulfilled manhood.
--Rudolph Lewis, Editor, Chickenbones.com

Mythology of

Pussy and Dick

Toward Healthy Psychosocial Sexuality

Marvin X

Reader Comment

Brother and comrade Marvin,
Thank you for keeping me on the receivers list for your written works! I count myself among the privileged.

As an artist i.e. truth teller-trail blazer you have always been cutting edge both in what you lived, experienced and the naked truth you bare in "emptying of Spirit out of itself" (as Hegel would put it) as did Trane's Offering. Very rare, and whether we all recognize it now or not we are fortunate to witness such openness and honesty, though it makes the smug uncomfortable in their fake comforts; show is the unessential masquerading as essential and therefore art as truth ripping off masks is often seen as dangerous expose.

I was reading Delores Nochi's Introduction to your new contribution, Mythology of Pussy and Dick: Toward Healthy Psychosocial Sexuality, and thinking of what she observed:

"Mythology of Pussy and Dick is a compilation of everything Marvin X has written on sexuality in America and the world. There are those who will miss this opportunity to receive wisdom from our brother because of the language he uses to describe the male and female anatomy, and his perceived objectification of women and men, and this is a tragedy because this information is crucial for men and women who are suffering from a psycho-linguistic crisis and inflicting actual violence upon lovers in their male/female and same gender loving relationships. These dysfunctional interactions are witnessed by children who are the next generation of couples... ..

I agreed with her and at the same time recalled the fate of those who preceded you in this undertaking - for instance the social scientist and psychologist Wilhelm Reich e.g. The Function of the Orgasm, Sexual Revolution and Sex-Pol [he was thrown into an American federal prison and his books burned in 1956, he died in an American prison in 1957 http://en.wikipedia/wiki/Book_burning#Wilhelm_Reich.27s_publications_.28by_U.S._Food_and_Drug_Administration.29

Also I thought of Lenny Bruce: Bruce served in the navy during World War II (1942-45) and began performing stand-up comedy in 1946. As he gained popularity in New York night clubs, his brand of comedy shifted from impersonations to free-wheeling monologues satirizing religion and politics. He released several comedy albums and appeared occasionally on TV, especially as a guest of Steve Allen and Hugh Hefner. In 1961 he was arrested after a performance in San Francisco and charged with obscenity. Bruce was acquitted, but for the next few years he was frequently in trouble with the law for using raw language on stage -- a no-no back then. In 1964 he was convicted of obscenity in New York and jailed for a few months (in 2003 Governor George Pataki posthumously pardoned him). http://www.answers.com/topic/lenny-bruce .

Delores' take on the depth and honest language of your work also made me remember the radical 60s and the writings of early contemporary feminists, such as the analysis of sexual biology by Anne Koedt The Myth of Vaginal Orgasm http://www.uic.edu/orgs/cwluherstory/CWLUArchive/vaginalmyth.html

But more directly your artistic style and the Avante-Garde revolutionary love and rebellion poetry and music of Archie Shepp - in particular his Blase http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TpE9SN81H6E

So! Your latest contribution here is evidence that the struggle continues! Thanks and stay strong!

Lil Joe

Preface

After a life of failed relationships, I am now an authority on how to fuck shit up. But I also learned how to keep peace in the house by speaking the language of love and receiving it from my beloved. Call it the tone test, if you will, but the language of love will go a long way toward healthy male/female relations or any human relations.

My mother told me I didn’t need a wife but a maid, secretary and mistress. In the fourth quarter of my life, I must admit and confess I think Mom was right. After someone read my essay Creativity and Sexuality, they said we must keep a balance.

And this is true except for those like myself who manifest the addictive personality that consistently borders on the extreme, somehow missing that balance that provides the stability we need to survive and thrive in this turbulent world, now racing toward The End!

I am much like James Baldwin who said, “I had to live recklessly in order to live at all.” And it seems I am also like the Barakas who live with high drama. It is doubtful I would be able to live a life without drama, being the dramatist I am, although these days I try to stay in the no stress zone, yet drama finds me at every turn. I am fascinated with lesbians because interacting with them is so dramatic.

There is a natural dramatic tension when one desires what he can’t have! It’s a challenge, even greater than seeking a heterosexual woman, although she is fine with me, especially if she has mastered the language of love and doesn’t talk in a provocative language, i.e., don’t tell me to do shit. I don’t have to do a motherfucking thang!

As the Maid, the Ho, the Cook (see story inside) taught me, if you ask me right, in the right tone, I will do anything and everything, but if you come at me in a dictatorial manner that expresses domination, you can’t get nothing here! Matter of fact, I’ll do the opposite, as in kiss my ass.

Today, relationships are fragile at best because people are under great stress generally: will we have a job tomorrow, a house, a mate, sanity? So we can only take things one day at a time. Again, there is great insecurity among the people, thus relationships are enduring major stress.

Yet, we cannot get out of these human relationships because love is all there is, even living in the imagination will not suffice, ultimately, we must leave our dream state to encounter reality, and the reality is that we often connect with people with whom we know and don’t know, whom we love and don’t love, yet must love. It takes the same energy to love as to hate, same energy. My favorite song says, “The greatest thing you will ever learn is to love and be loved in return.”

--Marvin X

Introduction

by

Delores Nochi

Mythology of Pussy and Dick is a compilation of everything Marvin X has written on psychosocial sexuality in America and the world: domestic and partner violence, rape, honor killings, stoning of women, female genital circumcision, sexual anorexia, verbal and emotional abuse, manhood and womanhood rites of passage. There are those who will miss this opportunity to receive wisdom from our brother because of the language he uses to describe the male and female anatomy, his perceived objectification of women and men, and this is a tragedy because this information is crucial for men and women who are suffering a psycho-linguistic crisis and inflicting actual violence upon lovers in their male/female and same gender loving relationships. These dysfunctional interactions are witnessed by children who are the next generation of couples. They will emulate what they see elders enact.

The same people who dare judge his choice of words, his linguistic dexterity, are guilty of lingering in the comfort of their bedrooms watching shows on big screen TVs that depict graphic details of violence perpetrated against others, especially women, yet they call it entertainment. If children learn more from what they see than what we tell them, how will they process and act upon the continued sexual chaos that is manifested in our families and society?

The author has proven himself to be a leader and a teacher who has the best interest of the community at heart.Not only does he teach almost daily at his Academy of Da Corner, 14th and Broadway, downtown Oakland, but often on national book tours, speaking at such colleges and universities as Morehouse, Spelman, Howard, University of Arkansas, University of Virginia, Penn State, Temple University, Medgar Evers College, San Francisco State University, UC Berkeley, Laney and Merritt in Oakland. He speaks truth with language that can be understood by the least of us and the best of us. His credentials includes brief tenure at Fresno State University , 1969, University of California , Berkeley , 1972, Mills College , 1972, San Francisco State University , 1974, University of California , San Diego , 1975, University of Nevada , Reno , 1979.

He embraced the system and defied the system! Oriented in the Muslim tradition of polygamy or plural marriage (see his play In the Name of Love, Laney College Theater production 1981); he has conquered his own demons and held his own with associated intellectuals and psychopaths.See his memoir of Eldridge Cleaver: My friend the Devil, Black Bird Press, Berkeley, 1979--one of the funniest books in history! In the words of James Sweeney “…Courageous and outrageous, he walked through the muck and mire of hell and came out clean as white fish and black as coal.”

We all have war stories about relationships gone bad. The difference between Marvin X and the rest of us is that Marvin X has lived what he is writing about, survived it and is willing to talk about it, and holds nothing back, narrated in language that will grab your attention and cause an epileptic seizure!.Each story is rich with commentary which speaks to society’s attitudes about male/ female relationships: rape, athletes, toxic love, crack house sex, women without men, language of love, religious persecution of women (a woman stoned); gay and lesbian youth, same sex marriage, and much more…

His parables are ingenious commentary about events in real time. If you are a follower of his blogs, then you know with each daily entry he not only provides us with happenings locally and nationally, but walks us through events from a historical and global perspective.See www.blackbirdpressnews.blogspot.com and www.parablesandfablesofmarvinx.blogspot.com.

Marvin X has chosen to sensitize our society by using words like pussy and dick. Language is fluid and if its primary use is communication, and if through words one fails to hit the target, then what is the point? It may be that the author is before his time, and in future generations, pussy and dick will become words of endearment, not relegated to the present negative connotations. Perhaps it will become a mantra chanted over and over as a pre-sex ritual. Why not? Lord knows we could use some more effective ways to get beyond reckless abandonment.

In his essay, The Maid, the Ho, the Cook, Marvin X demonstrates his tender side. Lil Joe describes this story as “One of the most beautiful pieces about real love I’ve ever read. The image of ‘crack-heads’ as scandalous and without human dignity is destroyed by Marvin’s recollection of this sister with whom he fell in love”. Because the object of MX’s affection is a whore, there are those, and you know who you are, who will lose the essence of this story which addresses real feelings and real interactions between a man and a woman. Perhaps, you have only loved when it was safe to do so. But all of us who have loved surely know that passion and feelings can at times be both spontaneous and unsolicited.

Is Marvin X the only courageous one among us who dares to “tell the truth and shame the devil”?

--Delores Nochi Cooper

Foreword

Sexuality is determined by biology and social psychology. In the socialization of humans, mythology plays a critical role in manhood and womanhood training rites. Mythology lies in the deep structure of the mental process, yet mythical notions, stories, tales, ideas, values are clearly present in the surface structure of human behavior. Ritual behavior is simply the enactment of mythology, the stories of the tribe, the values, mores, manners, morals. Myths prescribe the acceptable and the forbidden , the sacred and the profane.

Of course the Shaman often transcends tribal mythology to extend the narrative, take it to a higher level, much like a Coltrane solo, or a Miles Davis tune, connected to the past but very much into the present and future, the unknown, into the space of fear and dread, and yet it is beautiful, if we go there with Trane, Miles, Dolphy. So mythology must be fluid, dynamic. There comes a time when old myths must be discarded, thrown into the dustbin of history. And so it is with the patriarchy or myth of male domination.

In the patriarchal or male dominated society, men are taught they own women, that women are their personal property or chattel real, as opposed to real estate, i.e., land, buildings. Isn't it ironic that a people who are descendants of chattel slaves would continue in the tradition upon liberation, that they would perpetuate relationship slavery, i.e., marriage, girlfriend, boyfriend.

I don't want to own nobody and surely don't want anyone to own me. Imagine, the other day a brother said, "My pussy is at home!" We tried to tell him, first of all, he doesn't have a pussy, his woman has a pussy, so his pussy ain't at home. And imagine when he arrives home and "his pussy" is gone. When he locates "his pussy" will he be happy, sad, angry, violent, for why wasn't his pussy at home, why did it leave, or does it have the right to leave? Maybe the sister was with her friends, telling them, "Damn, ya'll, I got to go home to give that nigguh some pussy." They reply, "Girl, you ain't gotta do that, that's yo pussy, girl!"

In this atmosphere, women can be verbally, emotionally and physically abused. They can be beaten and killed for violating the man's so-called ownership of their bodies, minds and souls.
Clearly, there is absolutely no difference in a woman stoned to death in a Muslim society and shot to death in a Christian society because of her supposed adultery and/or infidelity. Of course, these days women are shooting the men to death for their freedom of expression or socalled sexual transgressions.

The man is more often than not afforded hero status in Muslim and Christian society for executing "honor killings" because he was disrespected by "his" woman. These days women are exercising their right to retaliate on the man for his indiscretions since marriage myths and rites suggest ownership by both parties, though man has the ultimate authority in the patriarchal society.

Women are now attending court mandated anger management classes and receiving convictions for assault and or homicide in the killing of their mates, all in the name of love. Tina asked what does love have to do with it? I ask, what kind of love is this--and if this is love I don't want it!

If we are to move toward healthy psychosocial sexuality, we must examine the myths we live by. We may discover these myths are toxic, reactionary and detrimental to our psychosocial health. We may need to transform and radicalize these myths/rituals in the light of modernity and post modernity or the new millennium.

In the present era of spiritual consciousness, we cannot behave as cave men and women. We cannot continue rearing little cave children whose behavior befits the Stone Age, bereft of compassion, willing to kill at the drop of a hat because someone dissed them, especially their girlfriend who gave up "her pussy" to a friend or stranger.

We must jump out of the box of ignorance, jealousy, envy, religiosity, narrow mindedness, insecurity and the world of make believe. We do not own other human beings. This is called slavery by any word. Partners, boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands, wives, must dispel and discard mythical notions of ownership and domination.

Our bodies are the temple of God, not the property of another. No attachments but to God! We are slaves or servants of God, Abdullah (we are all Abdullah, the servant of God). This is the attitude of radical spiritual consciousness. No one owns us but God. Our life and death are for God. We are thus free to do as we will since we exist in God and God exists in us. We are indivisible from God, thus we are God, we are Divine. Man is divine, woman is divine. We are equal beings in the temple of God and the temple of God is the universe, and all in creation is of God, by God and for God.

If you desire to surrender yourself to your beloved, this is your rite/right. In love, it is indeed all for the beloved, love is the annihilation of self for the beloved. Yes, we lose our "self" in the beloved. In my play One Day in the Life, Karima says, "I sacrificed everything for you, but you blew it buddy, I'm through with you!"

We pray you shall do the will of God in your relationships. If you don't, no one can judge you but God, especially the God in you or the self accusing spirit! Certainly, no one has the right to beat or kill you, stone you to death, shoot you in the head. Nor does anyone have the right to verbally or emotionally abuse you because of your behavior that may, from time to time, cross the line of propriety. And as per sexual transgressions, pussy and dick ain't nothing but a muscle, so why are you tripping over flesh, a muscle?

Your pussy belongs to you, your dick belongs to you and you alone. It is attached to you, not your boyfriend, girlfriend, partner, husband, wife, lover, trick! Human beings are subject to do anything during the course of a day, and you are free to do so. Vows of fidelity must be thrown into the dustbin of history, along with Santa Claus, the Easter bunny, and the return of a dead man after two thousand years.

If you persist in your wretchedness, ignorance and world of make believe that you own someone's pussy and dick, your mental health shall suffer along with the general condition of society that is rapidly heading to the precipice as we write. The mental hospitals, prisons and jails shall remain full of those partner abusers guilty of assault and/or homicide.

We urge you to free yourself from the prison of your mind based on primitive mythological notions of ownership and domination. Indeed, love the one ya wit, but you don't own them. You can't force them to do anything.

Why can't we just get along, Rodney King asked? Why can't we love and be loved in return? Why must we be ugly to each other, especially in the name of love? Why can't we love without the negativity? Why must we hurt the one we love, and yet, as Dr. Nathan Hare says, there can be no master without one willing to be the slave. Just as I cannot love you unless you allow me to love you, I cannot hurt you unless you allow me to hurt you.

Love begins with self love. If and when you don't love yourself, you cannot love someone else. You can fake the funk for a time. But if you don't know yourself, you cannot know your partner and mate. You can be with them twenty, thirty and forty years, but you don't know them. This is why couples break up after ten, twenty, thirty years together. They never knew each other, they were faking the funk, but the funk caught up with them. Yes, there was abuse because in their ignorance they first abused themselves, then abused their mate or partner simply because they never followed their own bliss or purpose as Joseph Campbell taught us. Nancy Wilson said, "I Never Been To Me!"

Indeed, life is about getting to the real you, your mission and purpose. When you cannot achieve this, in your frustration, you are bound to oppress and dominate your mate and those you love. Sadly, you have been programmed by the American or Western mythology of Christianity and Capitalism. You are thus the man and woman in the box. You may deny you are in the box, yet your very existence , and clearly your behavior with your mate is evidence you are inside the box of Christianity and Capitalism. In short, you are a slave, albeit a free slave, but a slave none the less. In turn, you desire to enslave your mate and children--Capitalism has programmed you to desire cheap trinkets, things and more things, conspicuous consumption, materialism, the world of make believe.

Yet with all your materialism, you have not followed your bliss, you are totally devoid of spiritual consciousness. You may be religious, yet your practice of religion is a desire for prosperity that would be alien to Mary's baby! You do not desire to liberate the captives, help the poor, the broken hearted, the hungry, the homeless. You are arrogant and wicked wearing your rocks, animal skins and plastic clothes. Yet you are not happy, nor is your mate. Even your children are little assholes, ungrateful bastards!

You hide the pain by medicating yourself with drugs, sex, video and internet games, religiosity and other escapism from your life of nothingness and dread.

We pray one day you shall awaken and throw off the chains on your brain, throw off the oppressive mythology of Christianity and Capitalism, or any other oppressive religion, including Islam, or any ideology that promotes pie in the sky or other worldism, escapism from facing reality with a radical agenda that is about seizing power from the blood suckers of the poor, the global bandits who promote the world of make believe.

How can you be at peace with yourself and your mate while you enjoy the benefits of a society that spends a trillion dollars per year to commit mass murder around the world to perpetuate a world of make believe, to keep people deaf, dumb and blind, consuming trinkets that send them directly to Yacoub's workers: the doctor, nurse and undertaker.

It is this mythological psychosocial order that has you drunk with thinking you must own and oppress somebody, especially those you supposedly love and cherish. Jump out of the box--free yourself, your mate and your children. Strive toward a radical spirituality that oppresses no one, but frees everyone. Love should not be slavery. Free your mind, free your mate, free humanity.
--Marvin X
9/9/10

Mythology Tentative Contents

Preface

Introduction

Foreword

Acknowledgment

Myth Defined

What is Love

Part One: Mythology of Pussy and Dick

Tiger Woods

Don’t say Pussy

Insanity of Sex

HIV/AIDS

Dick Slaves

Black Woman’s Tit KOs America

Sex

Sex and Race

The White Woman

In Search of My Soul Sister

Gender Studies at Academy of Da Corner

Part Two: Marriage and Family

You Don’t Know Me

Monogamy

Polygamy

Polyandry

The Other Woman

Men

For the Men

Women

For the Women

Parable of Value

Parable of a Real Woman

Parable of the Pit Bull

Parable of Woman at the Well

Parable of Woman in the Box

Parable of the Bitter Bitch

Children

Youth

Memorial Day (for young brothers)

Poem for Young Mothers

Parable of Family

Parable of the Baby Carriage

Parable of the Old Lovers

Part Three: Rape and Violence

Parable of Rape

VIP Nigguhs and Rape

Woman Stoned to Death

Confession of a Wife Beater

Parable of a Gangsta

Parable of the Dick and Gun

A Pan African Love Story

Toxic Love

Part Four: Prostitution

Same Sex Marriage, Straight Men and Prostitution

Negro Psychosocial Sexuality in the Post-Crack Society

Crack House Sex

The Maid, the Ho, the Cook

Pay the Ho to Go

Fillmore Slim on Pimpin

Part Five: Gay/Lesbian

Same Sex Marriage and Black Liberation

Love Letter to Gay and Lesbian Youth

Parable of Women without Men

Fable of Rooster and Hen

Part Six: Creativity and Sexuality

Poetically Gay

Poetic Sexuality

Poetics of Love

Part Seven: Reviews

Wounded in the House of a Friend, Sonia Sanchez

Political and Sexual Anorexia, Dr. Julia Hare

Mama at Twilight, Ayodele Nzingha

Bathroom Graffitti Queen, Opal Palmer Adisa

How to Find a BMW (Black Man Working), Dr. Julia Hare

Part Eight: The National Tour

Sacramento CA

Mississippi

Howard University, Washington, DC

Final Notes at Howard University

Part Nine: Conclusion

Toward the Language of Love

Parable of the Moment

Parable of Letting Go

Reconciliation

Joy and Happiness

Addendum

Comments

Glossary